Life is Stupidly Unfair: A Mom's Journey of Survival

I have been fortunate to have a couple of people I know who have also gone through a loss around the same time as me.  We have been able to talk about our feelings and be there for each other because we knew exactly how the other person was feeling.  I hate the circumstances in which we met, but am grateful to have people that understand. While Jasmine did have CDH, in the end it seems like the trisomy was what really caused everything.  So it's hard sometimes to even feel part of the "CDH Community".  I left a lot of the Facebook groups for a while because I just couldn't handle it, but ended up joining a few of them again a couple of months after the loss.  I wanted to be able to be supportive to others who had a baby with trisomy or a baby that didn't make it.   These pages make an effort to be there for both survivors and angel babies.  As much as they try, I know I, and a few others I have talked to, still feel like we aren't part of that comm

I know almost everyone has heard the saying "Comparison is the thief of joy".  I have been thinking about that a lot lately.  I feel like we are always comparing ourselves to others.  And there are two ways of thinking about it....either we feel better than someone or we feel someone is better than us.  I guess we can feel equal to others as well, but I think that's less common.  We are proud because we have more than someone or feel smarter than someone.  Or feel ashamed because we feel we aren't as smart or aren't as accomplished as someone. I think this also applies to grief.  We all grieve differently, yet we may feel we aren't grieving the right way or aren't grieving enough even.  I went back to work after a week and when I saw other people who took much longer to go back, I briefly felt kinda bad about it.  Like how could I be okay enough to go back so soon when everyone else wasn't?  But I knew it was the best thing for me and it didn

I recently saw a video on Facebook that I thought accurately described grief.  It said it basically becomes a part of you and that it stays the same and doesn't go away over time.  You just grow around it.  And that at certain times you revisit that grief and it feels the same as if the thing had just happened.  I liked this description a lot.  It shows that even though you continue to grow and change, that the grief is always there, but you as a person change. Today marks 6 months since we lost Jasmine.  Honestly, lately, I have felt like it happened much longer ago.  I think it's because I have made so many other changes in my life that 6 months just seems too short.  I noticed that I had felt a little sad at certain moments in the past week and couldn't really figure out why.  I couldn't really attribute it to anything.  Nothing really triggered it.  Grief is strange like that.  But overall, the happy days and moments far outnumber the sad ones. I also final